We are morally pulled toward God but we are unable to be morally perfect. We are like self directed spiritual punching balloons. We are drawn toward Spritual experiences, toward Godlikeness, toward goodness but we are naturally repelled by the holiness of God as we get closer to Him and we are metaphorically punched away from Him, though we can only go so far away from Him as we are drawn back toward His essence once again, repeating the process over and over but never arriving at a place of peaceful rest with Him. We cannot please him in ourselves but we are perpetually desiring but never attaining the perfection we know we are painfully drawn to. We desire Him, or at least His essences. Essences? Yes, His absolute goodness, His love, His beauty, His absolute strength, His purity, His self derived wholeness. But Him we naturally have a problem with. The problem is our pollution of Self. Why do we wander with unbridled lives, speaking with unbridled tongues, working with unbridled hands? We live for self. We love as an extension of our self. We cannot get away from ourselves enough to love Him perfectly. And so we are lost in an eternal tension between desiring the good but never attaining it, desiring God but never having Him. This is a torment to our eternal souls. It is like a man who repeatedly enters a strip club and cannot have what he visually sees and desires. Yet he torments his lusts by entering back in to feast his eyes upon what he cannot attain. Enter Christ. Light! What crisp fresh air for the soul! It can rest from its strivings and labors for Christ suddenly becomes the satisfaction for the soul and thus GOD enters a man's heart. Miracle of miracles! That a God so holy would enter in to a heart as dark as ours. When angels sinned one time, they were offered not one opportunity to repent. When humans sin He gives us MANY opportunities as well as the ability to repent. Light, breath, life, peace. It is finished.
